I am exploring further on the bondage and knots of human emotion, exploring questions that purpose every day on my mind. Why are we feel so guilty when we are not trying our best? Why am I so strict with my behaviour daily basis? Why do I feel pain and suffering when I can not make a decision? ....After a lot of research and self-reflection, I regard those negative emotion came from the collision of opposite desires (conscious desires and instinctive desires).
Conscious desires include desires of success and achievements of personal value. They usually require a longer waiting time of receiving a mental reward, which affects the decrease in satisfaction/pleasure and causes some mental suffering. The instinctive desires include sensual desires like sex, food, alcohol and entertainments, etc. The mental reward usually receives immediately.
The tangling wars between the opposite desires usually due to the limited time of human beings. One usually has to sacrifice the other. It’s those kinds of human ‘knots’ that drive us mad.
To express entanglements, mental suffering, internal dialogues and transform them into images, sounds and movements. I created a circle/knot which can be looped as the knots and problems will never be solved until we will never struggle in making decisions. The circle includes: Birth - Divarication - Control - Imprison- Struggle - Broken - Rebirth. In this case, the rebirth can be regarded as birth at the beginning and the circle start again and again.